Technology is supposed to make our lives simpler.
But its impact upon my world is best represented by the drawers and cupboards stuffed with wads of tangled and knotted multi-coloured wires, wrapped up lovingly together like an endless ball of string attacked by a coven of kittens with anger issues.
This spaghetti junction of a situation pretty much mirrors the confusion in my mind while juggling various, inevitably over-priced, gadgets which market themselves as wireless – but don’t actually work unless you apply miles and miles of, er, wires.
Technology is indeed the work of an inspired but flawed, and slightly evil, genius.
My bedside table – which once resembled a serene retreat with only a lamp (wire one) and an alarm clock (wire two)and the inevitable pile of books – is now a dystopian nightmare and probably a fire risk with dozens of leads, chargers,casually thrown aside devices and wires.
Obviously, none of these match each other but I am too scared to throw them all out.
A voracious bookworm all of my life, I now spend my precious reading time juggling between tablets, laptops, phones, Kindles and technologically enhanced fitness watches – all of which are wireless, out of charge, and I have inevitably forgotten the cable for.
In other words, approaching my side of the bed is comparable to wading through a pond of electric eels but with more trip hazards.
Leaving the house has become so much more complicated and involves several false starts as I return for electronic paraphernalia essentials and check I have turned my hair straighteners off.
The irony is that, even if I have managed to juggle all of these gadget-related responsibilities and applied right coloured wires into the right coloured holes, I can still come a technological cropper.
The wires might provide the key to technology but without the key – a mass of passwords milling in my mind -it is useless.
Safe to say this situation has me pretty wired.